~”My sister circle is small, but it is mighty.”

In today’s world of reality T.V. one could easily believe that the purpose of having friends is to have someone to fight with. The stars of these shows are smiling and happy one minute and trying to snatch one another’s wigs off the next. Is this really what we want society to think of us as women? Do we want to be portrayed as petty, violent creatures that are unable to control ourselves over trivial issues? I think not!

Now don’t get me wrong, The Real Housewives franchise is one of my guilty pleasures. The fashion, the antics, and the silliness are all entertaining. And we can’t forget the arguing, the name calling, the talking behind one another’s backs, and definitely not the physical altercations. After all, isn’t that the foolishness that keeps us tuning in week after week, year after year? But it is so incredibly important for us to realize that these Reality Shows aren’t a true depiction of many of the characters reality at all. The shows are often times scripted and/or edited to deliver the dramatic punch that will keep the ratings up and the stars making money. So while I watch some of these shows, I’m thankful that those aren’t the type friendships that I’ve fostered over the years.

While I have many associates that I am quite fond of, I only need a few fingers to count my true friends. My sister circle is small, but it is mighty. I know that at any given time I can pick up the phone, call them and they’ll be ready to do whatever or go wherever I need them to and they know that the same applies to me. I’m there for them and will do whatever they need me to do. No, I’m not talking about frivolous things, but if something goes to the left, we know that we can call on one another. We joke around, we tease, and yes, we occasionally disagree. But we are grown women that respect each other and ourselves enough to voice our views and opinions without taking it to the gutter or the streets. I can’t imagine ever raising my hand to fight one of my friends, or any woman for that matter. That is not what we were made for. We were given the gift of friendship so that we could find strength in each other. It is through real friendship that we find a safe a place to land when things spin out of control. It is our friends that will always be honest with us. They will tell us what we need to hear, not pacify us with only what we want to hear. Friendship is where we find encouragement, honesty and love.

I know that some of you may be saying “That’s what my man is for.” And you’re right, if you’re in a love relationship, then your significant other should be all of those things to you as well. Relationships built on friendship make beautiful love stories. But no matter how he tries, that man will never be able to fully understand all the complexities that make us the phenomenal beings that we are.

So again I say, the drama that unfolds on the screen is not the true reality of friendship. Real friends encourage your dreams, push you towards your goals, catch you should you stumble, and love you every step of the way. Every woman will not be able to be your friend. Everyone isn’t capable of giving that type of selfless love and my heart aches for those that can’t. We all deserve to be loved, lifted up, encouraged, and wrapped in the arms of real friendship. But let us never forget, we must be willing and able to reciprocate everything that is given to us in the name of friendship.

~Stacey Covington-Lee

Follow Stacey on IG @ scovingtonlee & Twitter @Covingtonlee and be sure to pick up her dramatic series on friendship and betrayal, The Knife In My Back 1 & 2.