“Then, one lady began to talk and she started off saying, “Ok, so we all know everyone has been molested as a child!” and she continued talking but I didn’t hear anything else after that. All of the ladies in the room nodded in agreement when she made that statement like it was normal.”

A few years ago I went  to a cookout with my boyfriend.  It was a cookout with his friends so I did not know anyone there and I usually hate going to parties and cookouts without knowing at least one person but I decided to go anyway. Well, when we got there the guys were in one room and the women were in another room. So of course, I was stuck being in a room with women I do not know. However, they all seem pretty cool and made me feel welcome. The women were talking about men issues and other things in an open forum and it was very entertaining and fun. I laughed and said an “I know that’s right!” on a few stories they shared. Then, one lady began to talk and she started off saying, “Ok, so we all know everyone has been molested as a child!” and she continued talking but I didn’t hear anything else after that. All of the ladies in the room nodded in agreement when she made that statement like it was normal. Now, I was never molested, but I didn’t dare speak up and say she was wrong with that statement. I didn’t want the ladies to feel like I was too good and couldn’t relate to them.  But, it got me to thinking….. Why are so many children being molested?

I remember my Aunt had a boyfriend and we called him Uncle Claude. He was a nice man and he took a liking towards me as a child. He would give me money and play games with me and my other cousins while my mother and her sisters were in one room talking and laughing. Uncle Claude never did anything wrong to any one of us, but he would often focus on me and I knew that as a child. He would only give me money and he would bring me toys and games to play with. So one day my father came over and I guess he noticed it too because my father yelled at me, “COME HERE!” Of course I was wondering what I did wrong. My father told me with a stern look on his face, “That man is not your uncle so stop calling him Uncle!” “And, if I see you playing with him or talking to him, I am going to give you a whooping and then I am going to whoop him!” I thought my father was the meanest father on that day. Uncle Claude heard my father as well and he made sure he stayed away from me from then on. We never spoke about it again. Now, as a parent I look back and I understand my dad. What if Uncle Claude was working his way up to that point of molesting me? I will never know, but my Dad but a stop to all of that! What if my dad wasn’t there? My mom didn’t notice anything wrong. I thank God for my father’s protection and I learned how to be aware of people interactions with children.

I have a son and daughter who I protect with my life. I know most parents share the need to protect their children as well. However, I have witnessed some parent’s actions that I just don’t understand. Now, I am not the perfect parent by far and I have made mistakes as a parent as well. I try not to judge any parenting style unless the children are being harmed as a consequence. Now, one example I have witnessed is the action of leaving kids with anybody to babysit.  I know a lot of mothers and fathers want their time away from their children for a night out with friends but please allow a person with a credible character babysit. You even have to watch out for your family members as well. For example, if you let your Auntie, sister, or girlfriend watch your child because you trust them please learn who else is at the house. What if their husband or boyfriend decide to have his friends over and they are drinking and carrying on? These are the circumstances that have resulted in molestation in a lot of cases. Sometimes people get offended when you ask them a lot of questions when they are keeping your children, but it is worth offending them versus than having your child molested. So, don’t be afraid to offend anyone when it comes to the safety of your babies.

My daughter would often have some of her girlfriends come over and spend the night from time to time because I wasn’t comfortable with her going over to their house. She had a couple of girlfriends that would spend the entire weekend over our house and I had no problem with it because they were good kids.  However, one of the little girl’s mother would drop her off and she would never come in. I thought it was kind of disturbing because she has never met me, doesn’t have my phone number, and she doesn’t even know my name. I had to ask the girl to call her mom so I can talk to her and give her my contact information at least. This little girl’s mother was so glad she was getting a break that she neglected to even ask me any questions. This is a perfect example of a situation that can break your child and change their life forever. It breaks my heart to hear stories of molestation and there are so many children that are being affected by this devilish act. These poor babies are not strong enough to fight off these terrible monsters, we as parents have to protect them. I hope this post wakes up at least one parent and helps at least one child from this terrible act!

~ Lisa

Follow me on IG @_forevergoldielocks