Should we stay together because of the kids?

~”Sometimes too much damage has been done in the relationship and couple can’t even be intimate with one another.”

 

couple angry on bench

Hell No!!.. That’s my answer to the question, “Should we stay together because of the kids?” Everyone deserves to be happy. Everyone deserves to live life to the fullest. No one wants to be miserable in a relationship for years. The amount of stress a relationship brings on a person will have an effect on his/her parenting skills anyway. You cannot be a good parent if you are always stressed out, miserable, unhappy, and living your life knowing you deserve better. In modern society, many kids are a product of divorced or single parenting. I’m not saying that is a good thing, but it is reality. We have to make things work with good co parenting skills for the children. The main focus is the children, therefore each parent should do what is best for themselves in order to provide a healthy life for their child.

Now I’m not saying everyone should run out and get a divorce, I believe in marriage and doing whatever it takes to keep the marriage together. Counseling and communication will help marriages stay alive if both parties want to continue their lives with one another. However, different circumstances such as cheating may be a determining factor for divorce without any reconciliation. Also, abusive relationships should never be tolerated in any marriage or relationship! Sometimes you just can’t work things out and people should not stay in toxic relationships because of their children.

Have you ever came home extremely irritated by the day itself? Have you ever hated to come home to a mate that you could not stand? How do you think your children feel when you walk in the door and they are happy to see you, but you are not happy to be home? Kids can tell when you are truly happy or putting on a fake smile. As adults we think our kids don’t catch on, but they do; especially the younger children! I remember as a child, I would hate for my mom to talk bad about my dad. I never told her, but it use to bother me when she would say little remarks about him. I wanted my mom and my dad to be happy and I wanted them to be together, but I also knew if they needed to live apart to be happy then I could deal with it. I may have been a different child, but I never liked to see my mom mad or angry because it affected the entire household. On those days my mom would be upset, I would stay in my room and only come out to eat dinner. As a child, those days worried me and no child should ever have to deal with that.

Every child deserves a great mother and father. No child should have to witness their mother or father living a life full of sadness, anger, unhappiness, etc.  I understand that various cultures see things different when it comes to this topic, but life is too short. People need to live! Parents are not being selfish making a decision to separate when they have children. Sometimes too much damage has been done in the relationship and couple can’t even be intimate with one another. Everyone should enjoy intimacy because that brings so much happiness! The children are the main focus and with mature parents co-parenting should provide a little more happiness for the family.

~Lisa

Follow on IG @_forevergoldielocks

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